Dan remembers all of time.
He remembers a lonely Saturday. He remembers Susan
distressed. At least
it sounded like she was disturbed. He asked
if she needed someone to talk to
just talk. She invited him over. He arrived
in all of puppy-dog eyed concern. She welcomed him in.
They sat. They talked of nothing.
"I'd rather see you smile than hear you cry." Comforting.
Susan smiled still sad eyed still distant. He eventually makes her laugh. He laughs. She is sitting quasi-lotus perpendicular to the wall. He is mirroring her then reclining stretching into the open room around the corner of the same wall she is sideways to proped up by his left arm still facing her legs crossed lengthwise. Receptive. They talk of nothing.
"Will you stay?" she shrugs toward the couch; the couch he helped move into the apartment. He inquiringly looks at her. She seems innocent. He is honest in his concern.
"If you need if you want... anything it's okay...." They talk about nothing. After a time they move to the couch each on opposite sides and talk. It is late. She stands shrugs towards the couch. He responds with perplexed expression. She moves over and removes one of the end cushions. He smiles sadly understanding; removes the other side cushions. She retrieves a pillow from her bedroom.
They lay down cuddling with his back to the rear of the couch. They attempt sleep his arms loosely around her lower ribcage her arms above his. The music plays on.
They dream. She writhes tenses groans relaxes. He comes to semi-unconsciousness whispers okay, it's okay, it's okay, my turn. He relaxedly concentrates. Your pain is nothing my pain absolves you. Squinches his eyes. Dream it out. Take away the hurt. Mote. He dreams of nothing. She moves; he allows sinking further into nothing.
A shift her turn. He is blank. She dreams. She yips sighs.
"My turn." They adjust slightly and he dreams of nothing rides limbo to a visual semi-consciousness. The room is lit by stereo light.
She moves to change her arms so does he. They end up holding hands interlocking fingers his right and her left. Agreeable?
Apparently not. She wrenches her hand away with a mumbled "no." His hand falls upon her breast. She dreamily bats at it a play slap uhn, uh. He flops his arm outward trapped by her body and weight. Left arm to her waist then along his cramped torso.
His turn. He dreams.
He wears a coat of many colors. He is surrounded
by nothing. He is wearing a robe of burnished white. He is on a hill. There
is a mountain to his back
a valley in front of him. He smiles
His arms outstretched near his sides
palms out and upward.
A surrounding crowd; she is there. Approaches. Kneals. He is saddened frowns. Motions with his right hand to stand. With me. She almost kisses his hand. He curls his fingers slightly and returns to the prior arrow to the sky posture smiling. She stands eyes upward oblivious. He returns to sadness then the tip of his left pinky opens. Sand starts to drain from him. He looks around. He is alone. Secures a stable stance and begins to suck his finger to stop the bleeding. It tastes like peanut butter.
He awakens. She is asleep. He tries to think
Tries to move
cannot. Relaxes. Tenses to consciousness. She is motionless.
He extracts himself from the couch and moves to the bathroom
Returns to the living room. She has absorbed the couch. Well
so he switches to the radio and seeks an agreeable source.
There is a table between him and her and the couch. A chess set on the table. He moves a piece black opening. Assumes a semi-lotus facing her. Meditates. Worships even.
She awakes near dawn. She opens her eyes wide; sits up.
"Have you been here the whole time?"
"maybe didn't mean that much
but it meant everything to me."