I don't know how to describe in some appreciable manner a certain state of mind because as soon as you realize what I'm talking about you probably won't enjoy some of its finer qualities. And that's a shame.
    Everybody should be able to turn on the radio and hear a beautiful song; the most beautiful song; a song so great that it was written for you. Or just the perfect song to hear at that moment. Everybody should be able to read a book and be able to see through the thinly disguised symbolism that it was written for them. Everybody should feel that special because it is a wonderful kind of feeling to read a printed text a book you know has been on a shelf where others can examine it something you know is a static form to have this respond to your most immediate thoughts. Regardless of how old the book is.
    Then there's always the curse.
    Inevitably any kind of discussion like this is going to lead to you wondering why I am paranoid delusional. You or some doctor would ask:
    "Who's watching you?"
    "You are", I would have to respond. And you would be, now wouldn't you, because how else could you have asked it? And I would be right.